Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

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What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

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What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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