Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? It was taped to the other monkey

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

Apirl showers bring... Tornadoes that kill families

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

Jackie Chan walks into a bar.

How do you keep black people out of your backyard. A no trespassing sign.

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

YO MAMA'S SO , A STUPID, THAT SHE PUT 2 QUARTERS IN HER EARS AND THOUGHT THAT SHE WAS LISTENING TO FIFTY-CENT!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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