What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

It's okay, I got the yogurt.

Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? A: Because he got hit by a bus.

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

This is a joke.

Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It needed excitement in its otherwise mundane lifestyle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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