knock knock who's there me me who It's me your son who was in prison for 6 years for false charges of attempted homicide

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

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What did grandma get little Benjamin for Christmas? Nothing, she died last year

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

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Why did the door close on little Timmy? He was getting gang raped.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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How high is the sky? True or False

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

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Two fish in a tank one said "How do you drive this thing?"

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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First the lord created light by shouti... ...Then the lord travelled back in time in order to create voice before that. The lord then said "I almost logic and everything failed at the very beginning. he corrected himself and saw it was good,

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops