Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

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Chris Brown can do no wrong. False he acquired several wrongs through his mistreatment of several women.

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Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

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Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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the lemon was sweet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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