Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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Why do babies have soft spots? The skull of a baby is made up of skull bones, and in the places where the bones meet there are soft spots made up of a strong cartilage to allow the skull to grow with the baby's brain.

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When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

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A fat guy!

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If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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Why didn't Joe catch the baseball? He got shot by a local gang.

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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Why do so many people like writting really bad anti jokes? Said Santa Claus

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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Once upon a time, The end.

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How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Why did Rainey fall off the swing? She had no hair.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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