What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

Who is a pussy ass bitch and is and has a chode? - Jeff Misner

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

miha kako si?

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

What did the car do? CRASH!

What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

Why did the 18 year old girl take her clothes off? To take a shower

so a moose walks into a super market and asked the lady where can I find the potatoes the lady says isle five so the moose goes to isle five and there aint no potatoes.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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