How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

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Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Your definitely a virgin, too bad your mom isn't too.

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Your adopted

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Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

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pudding

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Why did the little boy commit suicide? Because his dad molested him.

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what do you wear at a funeral? white. lol jk black

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

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What did michael jackson say to the boys he touched? Nothing. Hes dead

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

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what did the church group do at their picnic? drink the kool aid

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

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Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

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Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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