DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

whats funnier than womens rights? ottos weight

What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

what's the difference between eric bristow and colin baker? eric bristow is brilliant at darts.

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

Obama stumbles upon a KKK meeting. All the klansmen shake his hand and respect him because he is the President.

What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

To (down) Below: BAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LOLOLOL! MWAHAHAHAHA HOHOHOHO HEEEEEEEEEEHEEEEEEEHEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHA... Man I cant breathe! YUCK YUCK YUCK! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! AHAHA! HOHOHOHOHOHO HAHAHAHAHA!

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

why do you put a baby in the blender feet first to see its expression

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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