"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

once, my brother took my lard and gave it to the less fortunet

Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

A jew enters a mall.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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