What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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What's blue, red, and full of metal? Timmy in his favorite blue sweater, after he got hit by a truck.

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Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Set up. Set up who? Punch line!

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

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roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

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What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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Why did? Yes

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what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops