how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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Why did the little boy commit suicide? Because his dad molested him.

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There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

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A Mexican walks into Taco Bell, because it is the only restaurant within walking distance of his workplace.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Q:what did the Aardvark say to the other Aardvark. A: nothing because Aardvark do not have the mental capacity to carry out basic conversations

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

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whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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A Chinese man fails a math test

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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