A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

Three left giraffe testicles fell out of the sky and into a woman's grocery bag. "Did you know that 16 people die from dolphin rape every year? said Adolf Hitler as he began eating a horse.

(PC) Why aren't regular jokes as good as anti-jokes? Because they are worse than anti-jokes.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing. I don't know. Why? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

Black people are the scum of the earth

Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

What is worst than 1 baby dead in a microwave? 2 babies dead in the same microwave !

I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

I love it when i go into my classroom first thing in the morning, and the light are off... i always feel so Empowered... i walk in, and say Let There Be Light! while i lift my arms up and there was light.... omg! im god! O_O

What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

Doctor: I'm gunna try to fit your illness into an everyday, normal conversation. Is that okay? Patient: okay. Doctor: how are you? Patient: fine... Doctor: that's weird.. Because you have AIDS

Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

Why is there trees? Because they change color... Oh yeah and for oxygen by Burflared

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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