What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

thumb_up thumb_down +19

"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock knock Fuck off!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops