God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

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What do you call a child with a peg leg, and eye patch, and no hand? Names

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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25

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What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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Tilt your screen back .

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What's worst than dropping your watch into the gutter? Waking up with a penis on your head.

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Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

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Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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Kevin: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Bob: Because it's extinct? Kevin: No you idiot! The P is silent! Pterodactyl: RAARRGHH! (eats Bob)

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops