Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

whats funny about anti jokes? nothing hince the name ANTI.

Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

Swag.

Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

Guest what? Dog

Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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