How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

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Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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European on my shoes, buddy.

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Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Is your refrigerator running? No.

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

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The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

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How do u get an A on your test. U lock your teacher in the closet.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Stab them in the chest 43 times.

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Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops