Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

I wish you were never born. Me too. Then I wouldn't have been raped today.

What did the pepper say to Mr. Peno? Hallo peno!

An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

A man goes to the store to buy a kitten. While there, he decides to buy two because he is feeling particularly hungry.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

roses are red, violets are blue. hey.

What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. when life gives you melons, you are soon diagnosed with dyslexia.

Why can't sluts count to 70? Well, slut is a derogative term for prostitutes, and most prostitutes are people that had rough, often traumatising childhoods. Many ran away from home at an early age, thus leaving them devoid of a proper education.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating its way up.

I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

Your sex life.

When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...