Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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Nero, I have 30 million dollars left, lets split them and leave ground zero behind us, I know it would make me happy to share them with you.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

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Roses are Blue, Europe is Yellow. I suck at poems, Refridgerator

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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Bitch

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Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She died in a car crash.

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You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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What did the mexican fireman call his twin sons? nothing. they were stillborn

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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