How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

a disabled man takes a walk in a park

Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

save me from the nothing ive become

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

Your mamma's so dumb, we are seriously worried she might hurt herself.

Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

Rose are red, violets are blue, niggas is soft, just like you

roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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