Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

thumb_up thumb_down -23

my mind's eye?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

The guys Joke above me is funnier^.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

You walk by a boy and see he is playing with poop. You ask the boy what are you doing? He says I'm building a office. You ask him why he says "because I don't have shit to make a building"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

man, i read a lot but the are some words i can pronounce

thumb_up thumb_down -25

how do you know if your pleasuring a woman? who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -25

- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

the power to turn magnetism into light

thumb_up thumb_down -25

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops