What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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Buzi vagy!

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

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why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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Q: How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator in three easy steps? A: You open the refrigerator door, you put the elephant inside, you close the refrigerator door. Q": How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator in four easy steps? A": You open the refrigerator door, you take the elephant out, you put the giraffe inside, you close the refrigerator door.

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Whats gay and smells like paint? A gay man covered in paint.

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Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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