Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

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What do you call a black man with a club? Tiger woods.

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What do you call a person who kills a black? A black man

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

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How did the idiot die? He comitted suicide because people were picking on his stupidity. (If you laughed at this you are a horrible person)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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roses are red violets are blue cookie monster is gonna eat you big bird is yellow you look mellow dont forget elmo to

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PENIS

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Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

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One day a woman wrote a letter to her husband whom was at war. He received it, read it, and was happy to know she was thinking of him.

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

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Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

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knock knock who's there me i kill you

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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what do you call a black man falling off a cliff holy shit

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are many things that could be considered worse than finding a worm in one's apple. In addition, the matter of better or worse depends upon the point of view of the person in question, so what is worse than finding a worm in one person's apple may be preferable to finding a worm in another person's apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops