What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

alert("Hello");

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

thumb_up thumb_down +16

an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many baby's does it to paint a wall red? It depends how many you throw.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops