Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

nick and a mexican were in a falling plane.. nick ate the mexican... that is all..

Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

How many stripes are there on a policeman's socks? None, policemen must wear regulation plain black socks.

Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

Q: What's worse than both of your parents dying in a terrible car accident? A: Sitting in the back seat with your grandparents.

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

why did the boy die? because he got shot

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

Why was the man hit by the car? Hellen Keller was driving.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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