Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

Why don't women wear watches? In the technological age we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

Why did the boy lick the window? He had Down's syndrome

What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

roses are red violets are blue i have aids and so do you happy valentines day!

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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