What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

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Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

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there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops