What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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What's Worse Than World War I 2 World War I's

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

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What's 100 times worse that finding an worm in your Apple listening to Justin B. Sing! :-)

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Ich bin nicht der Anführer

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Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

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why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

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a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

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What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

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What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

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Why did the money due? Because it fell out of the tree

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What did the black man say to the Hispanic? Lovely weather we're having.

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops