What happens if you jump on barbed wire, but break your fall? You hurt your arm as well.

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A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

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Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

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Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

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What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

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A jew enters a mall.

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How did the old guy die? Of death and death related symptoms.

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

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How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

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Q: How many black guys does it take to black top a driveway? A: I can't give you a definitive answer unless I know the area to be covered, the thickness of material to be applied, and the capabilities of each individual working that particular day.

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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