Why did the frog commute suicide ? Because His mother was a type writer

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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well now

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

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One time i was sitting down

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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