Why was the butcher bald? He was undergoing intensive chemotherapy.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

An airplane's engine suddenly blows up in the middle of its flight. The pilot turns around and sees a blonde and a brunette. He turns to his right and sees only two parachutes. The pilot says "Ok guys, only two-" Then the plane blows up.

How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Can you smell what the Rock is cooking? Yes, it's delicious!

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

A man noticed that the sun was coming in brightly through his window. He was trying to take a nap and didnt appreciate the sunlight. He closed the blinds.

You: I have a question Person: Yes You: Do you have an answer?

What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

There was once a man who lived in a box.

What's worse than 100 dead babies stapled to a wall? 100 live babies stapled to the wall!!!

What is green and has 4 wheels?... Grass, I lied about the wheels

I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

Whats worse than breaking your Xbox? Being raped by your dad.

What did the black father get his child for Christmas? A Yo-Yo. Actually, never-mind, he doesn't know his father.

Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

Whats worse than your house on fire? an orphanage catching on fire. Whats wosre than an orphanage catching on fire? A bunny farm catching on fire.

Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

Why did the boy fall out of the plane. Because the plane was on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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