what do u get when you cross a monkey, a sock and wheels? A: a sock monkey. I was kidding about the wheels

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knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

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What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

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How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

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what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

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A man walks into a bar. Sup.

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms.

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Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

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There is a black man and a Mexican in a car. Who's driving? The driver.

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I wish you were never born. Me too. Then I wouldn't have been raped today.

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Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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They don't call it Bangkok for nothing.

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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What is short and yellow? Most Asians

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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What's the difference between a horse and a gorilla? Their penis size. Horses have relatively large penises, while gorillas are known to have the smallest penises proportional to their body size.

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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A horse walks into a bar the barmam asks why the long face The horse replies he's suffering from depression after his family was killed in a car crash and he has now turned to alcohol to sort his sorrows

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whats worse than death getting your nuts ripped of by a rabid racoon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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