Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's funnier than the holocaust? Pretty much everything, the killing of 6 million people was a horrible part of our world's history, and is no laughing matter.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why couldn't the blonde get pregnant? Because she was dead, and her reproductive organs had stopped functioning.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

thumb_up thumb_down -30

*Knock knock* I thought no one was home so I left... Turns out my grandma hung herself

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Whats 1+1? The answer!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Women can vote? wtf

thumb_up thumb_down -30

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Should a pole bump an alarm?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you call a man who only eats fast food? Unhealthy.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops