Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

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Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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A van drives into a car.

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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Why can't february march Because april may

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Q. How did the blind man cross the road A. By an abmulance which took him to the hospital because his first attempt to cross was unsuccessful and the hospital was conventeintly located on the other side of the road.

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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What do you call a quadriplegic man at a museum? "Sir," unless you happen to know his given name, in which case it would be most polite to call him that.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He prefers to bench press.

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How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

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Whats long, black, and fat? The line at KFC

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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