What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

68

Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

So a blonde walks into a wall...

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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