Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

The latter three thousand pages of this website.

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

What's slow and spotted? A cheetah, I lied about the slow part

Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican are on a boat, stranded in the middle of the ocean. Feeling a bit hot due to the above average temperature of an early april afternoon, the white guy and the mexican strip down to enjoy a refreshing dip in the water a few feet from the boat. The black guy, feeling a bit left-out and perhaps even envious at the apparent fun of the other two, speaks up "Hey fellas, do you think one of you could come sit in the boat so it doesn't float away so that maybe I can enjoy the water too?" Hearing this, the white guy and the mexican look at each other utterly astonished. Grasping for a rebuttal, the white guy gathers some courage and says "Do you really think that's a good idea?... You JUST finished your sandwich."

What do you have Canasta!!! Were not playing canasta you stupid asshole

What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

Your adopted.....

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

A man walks into a convenient store and asks the cashier where the toilet paper is. She says aisle five. He goes down aisle five and there's no toilet paper.

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

Whats better at driving? A pig or a chicken. Neither because they are animals and it is impossible for the to even posses the power of controlling a moving vehicle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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