If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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Q: Why do Indians smell? A: Cause they have noses? Racist.

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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A white man went to the basketball court to play basketball and was confronted by a group of black men. They kindly invited the white man to play basketball with them and they had a nice day

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Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

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How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

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I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

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What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

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A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

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Why did the boy get nothing from Santa? He's Jewish.

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

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Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

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DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

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A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

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Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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