A few people were put in a room with 5 doors and 4 were a certain death one was freedom and they had to choose a door to go in not knowing which was freedom the first person went in the door on the far left. He got raped by Michael Jackson. The second guy opened the door on the far right. He got in a room entirely made of ice cream. He ate all of it and got such a brain freeze his brain froze. The third and final guy turned around and noticed a door labeled exit. He exited the room and continued his life as a normal person

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

News:Little boy found dead in old man's white van. Turns out the old man goes to the store and when he comes back the little boy chokes on an apple.

sorry about this, my enter key is stuck down... Really sorry guys. Nearly fixed it. Look I said I was sorry! All fixed :~D

There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair.

Rosie are red velvet blue I made eggs just for you

A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

Why did the chicken cross the road? I stole your wallet and used to buy a prostitute. I had a great time. What was the question again?

Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

Twinkle Twinkle little wh**e close youre legs youre not a door. youre gonna get an S,T,D, youree only wanted cause youre free... Twinkle Twinkle little Wh**e youre cheeper then the dollar store

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

Why are black people so tall? Jesus was also black and therefore gives black people some favorable traits.

What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

What types of animals are the most dangerous? Dangerous ones.

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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