What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

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Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

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Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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Hello penis

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

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A man was shot. He died.

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A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Knock knock. Who's there. Suidi Arabia. Suida Arabia who? Huh? I was too busy loading my weaponry

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

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How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

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To momma's missing so many teeth it looks like her tongues in jail

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A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

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But I like being mean and angry! Nevermind, 158 according to Mensa`s standard bullshit test (my wife got 160, I remember we argued a lot over it because I kept insisting they would not use the same predictable pattern again... I overestimated them wildly I can make more advanced stuff than they can, and in no way do I consider myself "The worlds elite required to ensue the future survival and salvation of mankind`s finest and fittest" those fucking arrogant suckers,,,) Below average in any test including American presidents and historical events. Aaand about 450 in any bullshit online test which then offers you "more accurate tests" which cost money and probably destroys the fake confidence any idiot buying such a test in the first place might have built up,

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why did the white man walking down the street have no hair? he had had cancer for 5 years prior.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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