whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Evicted.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Guess what? AIDS!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops