A: Who keeps knocking on the wall? B: My neighbors have sex a lot. A: We should knock back.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

there is nothing better than waking up to realise that your being hugged by your partner unless that partner is not home

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the little girl's pet bunny pass away? Because her neighbor ripped out it's vitals.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? A wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? I'm sleeping with your wife

thumb_up thumb_down +1

On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many apples come from trees? None, not a single one of em'

thumb_up thumb_down +1

djkldfnblfnbofgb

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many christians does it take to change a light bulb? No one knows, by the time they finish unscrewing the burned out light, a hi-jacked plane crashes into them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the man go to Cantabria, Spain? Because he liked potatoes... jk

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a gay man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out for trying to seduce men.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I wife my butt after I poop. I poop out of my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you drowned a blonde? put ankle weights on her and throw her in a river.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the Asian dad say to his son when he got an A- in math? Good job son.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black man walking down the street? Danger Approaching

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops