Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Why was Johnny so mad at his father? Because his father had a constant drinking problem and was very abusive.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

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What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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LeBron James: Kobe, i got a ring will you stop making fun of me? Kobe Bryant: Yes Kobe and Michael Jordan: LeBron asked if he gets a ring if we'll stop making fun of him LeBron James: Hey Kobe why didn't you answer when i called? Kobe Bryant: Sorry, I only heard it ring once

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I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

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What's faster than a black man carrying your TV? The law enforcement that promptly catches him and is about to charges him with theft regardless of his ethnicity because stealing someone else's property is just generally an unlawful thing to do.

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Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

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How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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what is orange and blue 2 colors

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what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

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Waffles ate my grandma

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Why did the boat sink I shot a missile at it

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Who do you call when you see a ghost on the street? GHOSTBUSTERS!!!! no, ghostbusters are not real, you call the police

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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