What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

"Never trust what the internet says." - Abraham Lincoln

A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

What is the similarity between an elephant and a grape? Absolutely nothing. One is an animal, while the other is a fruit.

Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

why did tyler detweiler walk across the street? he didnt he has ceribral palsey

Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

whats the difference between an iron and a priest? An iron is a hand-held device which presses clothes and a priest is a person who is authorized to perform the sacred rituals of a religion.

A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

Karen was an average high-schooler. When she got home she often went online to chat with strangers. One day she started chatting with a nice girl named Jami. They really got along, Karen could tell Jami all of her secrets. One day, Karen decided to met her new friend at a local park without telling her parents. When she arrived she discovered the gruesome truth about Jami. Jami wasn't in high-school. She was a ten-foot tall, vicious, velociraptor.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What did the white guy say when a black man punched him? Ow, i am sueing for assault. that is a crime

Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...