A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

Q: How do you tell a Jewish person that you love them? A: You tell them "I love you".

what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

Q:Wats worse then cutting ur lawn A: diarea on a sunday morning

Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

okay i know you read this far but this is the turning point

I believe if Floyd Mayweather fought Muhammad Ali I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's

Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators are whitWhen falling from trees, they kill you

su algato es en fuego

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the tree fall over? The koala forgot to let go.

Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

HURT

Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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