Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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"Knock knock," "Who's there?" "Black man," "Black man who?" "Gimme yo money!"

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What is white and square? A ping pong block

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So Nero, seriously, don't be mean, call me, I am going to bed now, nighty nite.

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Yo mamas so dumb she has to repeat the 10th grade...again.

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Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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A pengiuin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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if you write treehouse backwards it spells gullible.

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A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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Knock Knock... Who's there? The FBI, you're going to jail. Really? No.

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hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops