I baked tonight. What did you bake? Brownies. What kind of brownies? Chocolate.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

Yo mama so ugly that she often has trouble being attractive towards people of the opposite gender

hello

An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

Knock knock Who's there . I said who's there. Sadly this poor man didn't understand he had just been door bell ditched.

What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

Q: what is an anti-joke? A: Coffee Volvos

A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

Hey, do you want to play the rape game ? NO! That's the spirit

no.

Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

what do you call a Puerto Rican with no arms? Trust worthy

Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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