Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

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What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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My mates dad hasnt had a job in 20 years... its probably why there all homless outside my house.

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What did the one Lame say to the other Lame? I don't know, what did you say?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

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what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

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This couple is having the most passionate sex ever one night, and the guy cums before he gets a chance to pull out. He gets the woman pregnant. Now they are married.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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people magazine

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Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

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Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

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Whats sorer than stubbing your toe? Stubbing your toe twice

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LO AND BEHOLD!

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Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

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A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

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How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

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Why did the road cross the chicken? REVENGE

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What do you call someone that has befriended a fisherman? Fishermans friend Moral: Strongest there is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops