Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

Womens Rights

What do you call a black man eating dessert? A man of African ancestry enjoying a sweet treat.

whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

You- I came up with a new word! Friend- What is it? You- Plagiarism.

How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

Flowers are colors Love me

I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

Gun laws don't work because criminals don't pay attention to the laws

Black people having a Job.

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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