Your friend says "Hi" What do you say back? You say "chunky salsa?" She said "what?" You think she knows you made out with her boyfriend last night. So... You blurt out " I'm SO sorry I made out with your boyfriend lastnight" Know.... Your dead meat.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing???? she had down syndrome

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

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Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

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Q:Whats the hardest part about eating a vegetable A:The Wheelchair

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What did Johnny do this wednesday? He went to school to be academically taught to get a high GPA of all the other children so he could go and pursuit his dream so he won't be left at home with a drunk wife and 6 kids with $190,000 in debt from the IRS

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ok last night i found a pic of romney saying "if i win the election 8 million people will have no job" then Obama says hey romney now that i won the election it would be 8 million and one stupid.

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Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

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What do chickens, pictures and babies have in common? Nothing.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Once there was an English man, A Scottish man and an Irsh man. They were all in a scenario where each of them had to undetake a task. The English man and the Scottish man undertook their task without any problems, but the Irish man was confused resulting in a hilarious outcome.

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What does a Jew do when he finds money on the street? He picks it up and is probably happy it was there.

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What do you call a dog with 4 legs? A dog.

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Know who had straight parents? Adolf Hitler.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

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Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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What did the dead guy say to the other guy? "You murdered me." How did he hear the dead guy? He was dead too.

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HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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Chicken

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What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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