Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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What is the meaning of life? 42

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Why is Evan short? He was born that way.

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What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ada! Ada who? Ada burger for lunch!

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A black guy walks into a resturaunt. he finishes his drink, graciously tips the bartender and leaves.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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Why are anti jokes so funny? Because they are not

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A lot eh?

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get me ball back.

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whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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